When Love Became an Act of Defiance
by runicmagitek
Summary: She did it to ensure Aeris' safety, but now all Tifa can think of is the girl she left behind and how they never thought to say goodbye. Role swap where Tifa is captured by Shinra before the Sector 7 plate collapses instead of Aeris. Mid-canon Aeris/Tifa


_for aertiweek 2019 on tumblr_

_day 4 - pastel / role swap / distance and reunion / absquatulate: to leave without saying goodbye_

* * *

Guns fired from above. Distant screams faded, mixing with the commotion. Tifa slowed to a standstill, yet her heart pummeled her chest. Civilians swarmed the gate leading to the Sector 7 pillar. A part of her hoped Don Corneo spoke of rumors, but there was truth in his words. Maybe there was still a fighting chance. Maybe they could save the day. Or maybe they were too late.

Her breath caught in her throat as she stared. Before heading to the Wall Market, she left a certain someone behind at 7th Heaven. She deemed it the safest place for her, but now all of Sector 7 was in peril.

"Marlene," Tifa uttered, struggling to stand upright. Her thoughts multiplied, quicker than the flashes of light gleaming overhead. She needed to stay and fight—for AVALANCHE, for Midgar, for the whole damn planet. But who was she to leave an innocent child alone? She shook her head and clenched her fists, the indecision chewing her alive.

Then a gentle hand settled on her shoulder. She flicked her eyes up. Aeris regarded her with nothing but concern.

"Tifa, what's wrong?"

"Back at my bar," Tifa rushed out, "is Marlene. She's just a kid and—"

"Let me get her." Aeris dropped her hands to cup over Tifa's, soothing the tremble living there. "I can take her somewhere safe."

"N-no, you don't have to do that."

"I can bring her to my home, Tifa. Please, it's the least I can do."

After several deep breaths, Tifa spoke, "But if something happened to you…."

Aeris cracked a brief smile. "I've been through my share of hardships."

More gunfire burst in the distance, but the series of yelps overwhelmed the action. Tifa jerked back with Aeris in time to witness the figure plummeting to the ground. Her body went cold; she recognized the shirt, the bandana. Cloud approached the still body, then shook his head.

Before Tifa processed the corpse of her ally, Aeris dipped into view. "Go."

"W-what?"

"Go get Marlene. If people are going to get injured, I'm better off here." She scanned over Tifa. "Besides, bet you'd outrun me any day." When words escaped Tifa, Aeris continued, "Bring her to my place. It's Sector 5, close to where the church is. You'll know it's the one when you find the flowers."

She almost forgot how to breathe. "Aeris…."

"_Go_."

Aeris squeezed Tifa's hands. When had their fingers interlaced? Tifa swore the tips of their nose brushed.

"I'll make sure things are okay here," Aeris murmured. "Now hurry!"

She released her, but the tender hold still warmed her palms.

Tifa couldn't remember what she said in response, if anything at all. Her muscles ached as she ran, shallow breaths dragging in her throat like glass shards. She needed to find Marlene and get out. Somewhere safe, somewhere that didn't involve bullets or blood or a damn plate daring to crush thousands of innocent people. She broke the door off its hinges upon reaching 7th Heaven and screamed for Marlene while thinking of Aeris.

A smile lined her features before Tifa left. Or had she imagined that? Was she keeping up with Cloud and Barret at the pillar? Would their combined efforts be enough?

Would she ever see her again?

_Don__'t be ridiculous,_ Tifa scolded herself while scooping up Marlene. _Everything is going to be fine._

She repeated that in her mind. If it echoed enough times, it would become true. It was all that fueled Tifa, racing through the twisted back alleys of the slums. It brought the promise that once this was over, she could find Aeris and thank her. For her kindness, for her inspiring resolve, for everything. She wasn't worthy of the likes of Aeris, a stranger in some ways, considering their short time together. Regardless, she bonded with her better in those few hours than the years Tifa spent chatting with her bar regulars.

She ran and tried to remember Aeris' smile, the one she wore despite all the corruption and chaos they lived in. The image of that sweet face faded, but the subtle heat from their fleeting touch still burned in Tifa's hands.

_Everything is going to be fine._

* * *

She noticed the flowers first. Aeris had mentioned the cracks in the plate allowing enough light in to grow flowers. A little oasis amidst the slums. Tifa savored it from afar and skidded to a halt before colliding with the suited man blocking her path.

The shade of blue, the Shinra-issued cut—Tifa knew a Turk a mile away.

"Well then," he said, "not exactly who I was expecting."

Marlene buried her face into Tifa's shoulder. She hugged the little girl. "Get out of my way."

"Or what?" He tilted his head, a slight smirk pulling his lips. "You're one of those AVALANCHE terrorists, right? Not exactly an ideal time for you." He glanced at his watch. "Almost on schedule for the Sector 7 plate to drop."

Tifa darted to the side. Maybe if she slipped past him, let her speed tilt in her favor, she could escape. She stopped after three steps as a dozen men emerged from various hiding spots in the debris and garbage. Guns cocked, each one aimed at her.

"Like I said," he continued, ambling towards her. "Not an ideal time for you."

Gritting her teeth, she fashioned him a hateful stare. "What do you want, Turk?"

"I was hoping you'd be the Ancient, but a terrorist captive will have to do."

"I'm not going anywhere with you."

He snickered. "Tell me where the Ancient is and maybe I'll reconsider."

_The Ancient? Who is he talking about?_

Another step and he leaned in closer. "Or has your new friend not told you what she truly is?"

Tifa's eyes widened. _Aeris?_

"Ah, so you _do_ know. Where is she?"

Ice coated his demanded, but Tifa didn't flinch. "You'll never find her. I won't let you."

"I admire your resolve. I wonder how long you plan to keep that up."

Tifa released a breath and settled Marlene to the ground. "Take me, then, but spare her. She has nothing to do with this."

The man regarded Marlene for a moment. Tifa clenched her fists, prepared to lunge at whoever pointed a gun at the girl. Then he lifted his hand to signal at the soldiers. Each one lowered their weapon.

Marlene looked to her with teary eyes. "Tifa?"

"Go," she said, trying to smile for her despite the tremble in her lips. "Head to that house up ahead. You'll be safe there."

"But... will _you_ be safe?"

She glanced at the Turk. No remorse lingered in his gaze. "I'll be fine," was all she could offer.

It was enough to make Marlene run, enough to buy everyone some time. Aeris was safe and nothing else mattered.

* * *

"What's the status?"

Tifa leaned over the arm of her cramped seat and peeked back. Between the helicopter's whirs and her frantic pulse, eavesdropping proved to be difficult. Another suited figure stumbled in from the open side door. A Turk, no doubt, albeit with a disheveled appearance considering his unbuttoned shirt and messy hair in comparison to the sleek black hair of her captor.

The redhead shrugged, his back facing Tifa. "Plate's going to fall, alright, but there was a snag in the plan."

The other Turk narrowed his eyes. "What happened?"

"Figured you were after the Ancient girl, but I didn't expect her to show up on the pillar."

Tifa held her breath. She watched the Turk's eyes widen and his complexion pale.

"She's there?!"

"Yeah, like I said—"

"And you didn't grab her?!"

"Shit, you don't think I tried? Had some AVALANCHE idiots protecting her while—"

"You idiot, the plate is going to fall and you left the last Ancient there to die?!"

He pivoted and marched to the cockpit. Tifa couldn't make out the demands he issued to the pilot, but his fist slamming into the console said plenty.

She turned back to center. Her pulse thumped in her throat. Her arms bound behind her back tingled, seconds away from numbness, but it never blipped on her radar.

Aeris was down there. She wanted to stay behind and help. Tifa let her. And now she was going to die.

"Sir, we need to leave before the plate collapses!" the pilot screamed.

"We need to acquire the Ancient!"

Tifa clenched her jaw. How _dare_ they speak of her like an item to grab on their to-do list.

"Let it be, Tseng." The redhead's voice was barely audible above the torrent of motors and wind. "We can always dig out her body. Better than nothing, yeah? Hojo'll figure something out."

She fluttered her eyes, ignoring the onset of tears. _What if I was down there? _Tifa wondered. _What if you escaped and didn__'t have to die? _She dropped her head. _No, but then... these Turk creeps would have found you. Maybe... maybe death is kinder than whatever Shinra had in mind for you._

The helicopter jerked skywards. Tifa buckled forward, the seat harness digging into her and restricting further movement. She brought her attention past the window; the slums were a smear of dull colors from a distance, no different from the rotted dirt they lived on. The helicopter zoomed away and the slums shrank until they emerged past the plate and loomed over Midgar.

Another time, she would have marveled at the spectacle. Nothing awed Tifa as the Sector 7 plate buckled and crumbled.

"No!" she shrieked.

That was it. No amount of tears would change the outcome. They lost. Sector 7 and all its civilians were gone.

AVALANCHE was dead. And so was Aeris.

Aeris. No. How could she have known? It was beyond their knowledge whether the pillar would be salvaged or not. They made choices, none of which were entirely right.

_What could we have done differently? _Tifa kept to herself, tears streaming down her face. _What can _I_ do to make things right? To bring you back?_

"Well," someone spoke behind her, "show's over."

Her seat spun in place. Tifa hitched her breath as she confronted the redheaded Turk. He towered over her with a smirk, tapping his nightstick against his shoulder.

"And what do we have here?" he almost purred out.

"She's with AVALANCHE," Tseng said. "Found her instead of the Ancient."

"AVALANCHE, eh?" He tilted his head. "Hate to break it to you, sweetheart, but AVALANCHE is dead."

Tifa spat in his face. He flinched, wiped his face, then cracked up.

"Oh, you got spunk! I like that!" He leaned in, blue eyes inches from her as he grinned. "Not to worry. You'll be joining your friends soon enough."

* * *

Tifa collapsed to the frigid floor. The guards muttered back and forth, cackled, then closed the door. She fought before, tried to slip past them until they locked her up. Now she slumped in her jail cell, the fluorescent light outside narrowing across her face until it vanished.

She stared through the darkness, features as lifeless as her confines—like those lost in Sector 7. The echo of the foundations crumbling still haunted her. That and her doubts kept her company while Shinra held her hostage.

And for what? AVALANCHE was gone. They claimed as such each time they hauled her out and strapped her to another chair for another interrogation. Tifa never humored them. Despite the humiliation and eventual torture, Tifa clung to her silence and cherished it. Her defiance earned her enough bruises and scars to impress the kids in Nibelheim back in the day. Badges of courage or something like that—proof they confronted misfortune and lived to tell the tale. But who was left to listen to Tifa's story when she was finally free?

If. _If_ she was freed.

Closing her eyes, she pushed herself to seated. Her lean muscles trembled, sapped of strength and begging for proper rest. She fumbled multiple times—nothing new—and eventually sat upright and scooted to a wall to lean against. The act alone left her breathless, sweat slicking her forehead as she ignored the pain buzzing from head to toe. How much longer until Shinra deemed her a lost cause? What would they do with her? Public execution, perhaps? That seemed like their style. Or maybe they had more sinister plans for her. She winced at the thought; death would have been kinder.

She kept returning to the same notion. They were gone—everyone she knew. Biggs, Wedge, Jessie, Barret... they failed their mission. All those years of preparation and desiring nothing but Shinra's demise. Just gone, like they were never there to begin with. And Cloud, reappearing in her life like a ghost and tagging along for the hell of it. She never did get the whole story out of him. Maybe he never would have enlightened her. It brought a brief smile to her cracked lips; so long as he got paid, nothing else mattered.

And Aeris. Sweet, gentle Aeris, dragged into a mess that was never her problem. She was gone, too. No more sassy banter, no more stubborn optimism, no more kindness despite the atrocities sweeping around them. All of it vanished. She barely knew the flower girl from Corneo's mansion, but they found solidarity in each other.

Tifa didn't stress over the what-ifs of their predicament—if Aeris would be alive or even better off if Tifa stayed instead—and now dwelled on those moments they were oblivious to the borrowed time they spent together. She missed her. More than she thought she would. She wanted that spirited girl who helped her fight their way out of the mansion next to her. Maybe Aeris could instill her with some hope, that the crummy cell Shinra locked her in wasn't _that_ bad. Then again, if she had Aeris beside her, any location was bearable.

Tears pooled in her eyes and cascaded off her jaw. _Damn it, I want you here._ She wrapped her arms around her quivering form. _But you never will be here or anywhere again._

She recalled the tender sensation when they locked hands before parting ways, unaware it would be the last time. Maybe if they knew… maybe it would have been different. Maybe Tifa would have spoken the words even she didn't know she kept secret. Maybe if Aeris knew how much she cherished their short time together, then the tragedy would have been less painful.

Now all that remained were memories Tifa clung to. She thought of the stunning dress Aeris donned and her insistence to tag along and help despite not knowing Tifa and the way her lips curled when she smiled and how reds and pinks suited her complexion.

She thought of the flower Cloud gave her. Tifa had fished out an empty, glass soda bottle to fill with water before slipping the stem inside. Not the classiest way to preserve the pastel blossom, but it allowed Tifa to admire it beyond a single day. She gazed at it more often than she cared to keep track. Her little sliver of sunshine nestled in the darkness. She loved it and never thought the one who grew it would be lovelier.

She thought of how its gardener mirrored that exact warmth and brilliance.

She thought of how they were both buried beneath endless rubble.

Tifa coughed up a sob. She doubled over and clutched her head. Why couldn't she have realized it sooner—that her heart skipped for a reason when Aeris was around. But it was too late and she was gone and Tifa wished Aeris knew how much she loved that flower.

If only circumstances were better. If they had met somewhere else, maybe things would be different.

Maybe she wouldn't feel as if she was saying farewell without knowing it.

* * *

The door clicked open. Tifa stared at the ceiling without acknowledging the guards sent to carry her elsewhere. Maybe this time they would be done with her. They dragged her out, one man on each side as she dangled like a dead weight. Bright lights flooded the area after a trip down an elevator. Tifa winced and lolled her head back; she didn't recognize this place.

There were no interrogations. No Turks threatening her when what she cared for was already taken from her, no media crew preparing to televise her execution. Test tubes lined the immaculate space with endless wires tangled like cobwebs.

She didn't know the man the guards called Hojo, but when his tense gaze scrutinized her like a lab rat, Tifa discerned all she needed to know about him.

The guards heaved her into a new cell, encased in glass and over-illuminated. She pushed herself to her knees and squinted past the blazing, white lights as Hojo approached her.

"You're not what I expected," he said.

Tifa bit her tongue. She didn't care for small talk; whatever information she extracted from him, if anything, wasn't going to be useful to anyone outside of herself.

"I had preparations for someone with the blood of the Ancients," he rattled on as assistants filtered in to stick monitoring devices onto her, "but I suppose you will do for another pet project."

She winced during the IV application. More needles, more wires leading to nowhere. The restraints on her limbs were nothing new, either. The oxygen mask secured over her face, however, brought a skip in her pulse.

_What the hell is this?_

The assistants vacated the area. The glass door hissed shut. Silence hummed all around her, despite the machines flickering to life outside and various lab workers moving their mouths.

A speaker inside crackled to life. "It's been a while since I was given clearance to test this," he said. "Do try not to move too much; it can yield false positives in the blood work afterwards."

Valves groaned open. A vibrant, glowing liquid gushed out from overhead chutes. Tifa gasped, adrenaline guiding her movements as she tried to escape. _Is this__… Mako?_ Movement from the corner of her eye caught her attention. Something spiraled through the bundles of tubes leading to her—whatever it was, she swore particles twitched in the ooze creeping to her IV.

She trashed in place, desperate to free herself. Nothing loosened on her wrists or ankles. Only the sound of oxygen flowing through her mask and the splash of Mako flooding the container.

Then she paused. _This is it,_ Tifa thought, her shoulders slumping. _Maybe now,_ she kept to herself as the Mako swallowed her inch by inch, _I can be at peace. I can__… I can reunite with—_

Lights flashed from outside. Tifa almost ignored it until blood splattered the glass. She jerked her head back and snapped her eyes wide open. It wasn't a light fixture malfunctioning—it was gunfire.

Guards rushed in to defend the area. Some fell, some persisted. It played out in silence from Tifa's end. _What__'s going on?_ she wondered, numb to the Mako at her waist.

Then she recognized the massive blade cutting through Shinra lackeys and the particular gun-arm aimed at Hojo.

And she recognized the blur of pastel pink rushing by.

Tifa's jaw dropped. "Aeris?" She attempted to stand, but the binds denied her the chance. "Aeris!"

She spun around and met Tifa's gaze. Her hands clamped over her mouth briefly before she ran for her. Aeris pounded on the walls and moved her lips, none of which penetrated the container.

Tifa simply shook her head. "I… I can't hear you. Just get me out of here, but be care—"

Aeris spun her staff in her hands and struck the glass multiple times. No luck. She turned to flail at Barret, who held Hojo at gunpoint; there was a verbal quarrel, then a physical one. Barret overpowered the man and smashed a fist into a console.

The door hissed open, Mako gushed out, and chaos flooded Tifa. Gunfire and alarms pierced the air, intermixed with distant screams and comm speakers. She ignored it all to focus on the girl wading through Mako to reach her.

"Tifa!" she cried out, dropping to her knees. "Tifa, it's going to be alright!"

The words cracked in her dry mouth. "What are you doing here?" she managed to ask.

"What, you can't tell?" Aeris busied herself with removing Tifa's oxygen mask and various tubes. That horrid goo never reached her bloodstream, a miracle in of itself. "We came to save you!"

Tifa parted her lips to ask, but nothing surfaced. She was motionless while Aeris quickly freed her, still swearing what transpired was a dream, or perhaps a nightmare induced by new Shinra technology, and waited to jolt back to reality, back to her cold jail cell. But Aeris helped her stand and clung to her with no intention of letting go.

She was here. They all were—alive and ready to fight.

"You're okay," Tifa murmured.

Aeris tilted her head and smirked. "Even better now that we've finally found you."

"Aeris, I—"

A new alarm blared to life. Whatever button Barret punched opened more than her test container; it opened every cell in the laboratory. Grotesque monsters wobbled out, skewering Shinra employees fleeing the site.

"Aeris!" Cloud called out, brandishing his buster sword. "Take care of Tifa!"

"On it!" She readjusted her arm propping up Tifa. "Come on, let's get you somewhere safe."

Behind a stack of crates was their haven. Aeris settled Tifa down and knelt beside her. A refreshing breeze encircled her while she murmured quiet words—the magic did the rest and restored Tifa's stamina. With that burst of energy, she wanted to pounce Aeris and smother her with hugs, but the hands pinning her shoulders said otherwise.

"Just take it easy," Aeris said with a smile. "You were a hard one to find, but not a problem. After we found Marlene, I had to drag the other two on up here. We almost kicked down the front door, guns blazing and all. That was Barret's idea, though. Can you believe that?!" She sighed. "But we're here now."

Tifa gazed into those eyes inches away. They were green. She never bothered the check before and the odd lighting by the pillar made it hard to tell and—

"I thought you were dead," Tifa blurted out. She tried to hold back the tears, but nothing eased the emotions from overflowing.

Aeris' smile faltered, but only briefly. "I thought you were, too." She paused. "But the planet told me you were okay; I knew I had to find you."

"The… planet?"

"Don't worry about it," she said, shaking her head. "We're okay now. That's all that matters."

"Aeris?"

"Hmm?"

Tifa licked her lips, swallowed hard, and placed her hands over Aeris'. She stopped breathing to test the spaces between her fingers.

"I'm sorry," Tifa murmured. "I never meant to mix you up in all of this. I… I wanted to keep you safe. I wanted to protect you and yet—"

Aeris slid her hands free from Tifa's before she settled into them fully. Tifa froze, no longer aware of the battles unfolding or the facility they were stuck in or anything. She focused on how Aeris moved her hands down, how she traced the edge of her suspenders, how she curled her fingers into them.

How she snapped them towards her, jerking Tifa along in the motion, and caught Tifa's lips with her own.

Her eyes widened. Her pulse skipped from the shock, then anticipation, and finally elation. She closed her eyes, melted into Aeris, and deepened the already hard kiss. They clung to one another, savored whatever heat they sparked at that moment, and broke away only when their lungs begged for air.

Tifa rested her forehead against Aeris'. They panted, heavy breaths tickling each other's lips. Green eyes opened to her and Tifa longed to stare in her kind gaze forever.

"I've been wanting to do that for a while," Aeris whispered.

Tifa raised an eyebrow. "Is that so?"

Aeris bit her own lip. Blush warmed her cheeks, the same hue as the ribbon in her hair and the flower Tifa admired before she knew Aeris existed. "Yeah." Fingers slid up and down the suspenders, almost anxious. "Since I first saw you."

"Well… good to know the feeling is mutual."

Aeris giggled. So did Tifa. They nuzzled into one another, ignoring everything else to bask in that embrace.

"You never need to be sorry, Tifa."

"But—"

"No." Aeris squeezed for emphasis. "We can't change the past, but we can share the future together, right? That's all that matters to me." She lifted her face and tensed. "Tifa, you're crying. What's wrong?"

"Nothing." She grinned as Aeris flicked away the tears. "I'm… I'm happy. Absolutely happy."

That sweet smile Aeris always wore swept across her lips. She cupped Tifa's cheeks and kissed away the tears, though they kept flowing.

"Maybe we should check up on the boys," Tifa said when the monstrous roars settled down.

"Hmmm." Aeris tilted her head. "Nope."

"No?"

Aeris snuggled in closer and pulled Tifa into her lap. "Let them come find us, if they can."


End file.
